星期六, 八月 19, 2006
One thing i hate about blogging is tinkin of how to start n how to put my tots across. It seems like i've always wanted to write about something but whenever i log into the 'create post' page my mind went quite blank.
Anyway...
I guess part of me likes to go to clubs. But yesterday's event made me realize somehow that it's the company tt matters. Cox siwei's og was quite near me and my company, they were so loud n crazy all the time...It reminds me of my og in jc. I remembered how I like to go crazy too wif new cool pple, flirting (ahem)...yes i like to flirt! Be attended to and be entertained... I really miss that feeling...perhaps the reason why is cox probably i have less friends now...or less crazy frens..or that i'm simply less attractive, nor likeable.
It is farnie to notice how i wish my friends were more enthu towards the club thingy yesterday yet today when lizhen jio me to club i juz became like my friends - uninterested n not so crazy. I tink one of e reasons was bcox i felt she was more interested in MOS den us, as in she juz needed someone to go wif her, doesn't matter who. Perhaps I was a little unhappy, it striked me how alike me and her attitude were yest n today....perhaps i don't really care who's gg to zouk wif me yesterday. All i wanted was some company so i can support siwei. And I FELT SO WRONG. I knoe how impt it is to b always sincere, yet i seem to take friends for granted sometimes. N part of my unhappiness in this complex whirlpool of thoughts in my mind made me angry at siwei for not coming to c me tonite. I tot he was a spoilsport. i tot he didn't care abt me. *grrrrrr...y izzit happening again.....*
Oh n about socializing for the sake of attaining contacts for personal future use, it turns me off. Esp when lizhen told me that she's coming to hansgrohe to c the exhibits cox she wans to check out the place and prob increase her 'contacts', i'm really disturbed. I know it's like nothing wrong about that, but i felt that she has an 'ulterior motive', like gg to hansgrohe n MOS. Does it mean everything she does or places she goes she tinks about how they can serve her in the future? *sheez*
Please forgive my pathetic english...and I'm glad i finally wrote all of it out.
nothing else matters on8/19/2006 12:27:00 上午
-•-
