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星期四, 三月 17, 2005

Seems like the blog is slowly becoming a place for me to complain to. Found studio more and more depressing. Mabbe it's bcox i am not doing as well as last sem, mabbe it's becox of patrick, my tutor. Hmmm it's weird, i just realise this is the first time i'm actually disliking my art tutor, (used to be on quite good terms with art tutors.) Tutors really have an impact on me, their advices, comments - verbally and visually. It's getting abit annoying for my case. He seems to have weird responses - the way he frowns, his signature "unsure-ness", and his sarcastic "are u stupid" look. SERIOUS. He makes me feel like an idiot sometimes, i wonder if anyone of us bears similar thoughts, though i think he really is a damn smart guy.
I know my works have been failing me, and them...I'm concerned! But i'm just pathetic, stuck, constipated. And i only have 2 weeks to assure myself, and christian, that i'm right. Christian really thinks quite highly of me, actually he made me feel better juz now by tellin me tt the head of depart is v impressed with my works. But i kept letting him and myself down...I feel so down I really want to do well....this is so depressing. I think i'm caught in this viscous cycle of being stressed, drought, stressed, no ideas...no good ideas.
Find everyone around me improving -alot, he told me if there exists any competition, it's against myself and not others.

nothing else matters on3/17/2005 10:31:00 下午

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