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星期四, 二月 26, 2004

went out with lijun and lz today to celebrate lz's birthday...perhaps it's juz another excuse to get together and tok tok...:)
lj told me all abt wat zj did during vday for her-sending her flowers, a big bear and chocolates...woah, she even sent me a picture of the bouquet of flowers zj sent her...he managed to do all tt even when he had to go camp. That really made me envious. I knoe i shldnt compare myself with her and siwei with zhanjiang...i knoe different guys expresses themselves differently...besides, siwei's timetable is different from zj's...but dunno y the more i tink of the sweet things zj did for lj really made me feel sad...wat she got was like wat i had always wished for secretly...jux that i knoe siwei wont do all this for me.
I'm begining to hate v day and my birthday.
Heck cares if i sounded like i'm juz a materialistic girl. I knoe i'm not. I just wanted an occasional surprise, a once-in-a-blue-moon dream cum true...but i knoe it'll never cums...

it never cums.

Wat makes me feel damn sad abt myself is that i'm desperately tryin to hold back my tears at 12am, hopelessly pouring out my sorrow in front of a computer screen, hoping that someday someone will saw this and perhaps, pity me?

nothing else matters on2/26/2004 11:51:00 下午

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